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Most of you probably know my dealings with my Aspie prof. and love interest. For the past two years, he's had trouble sitting next to me because he'd get aroused and had to rush to the bathroom. This past month, he has finally been able to control it and he can at least sit next to me. The last time I saw him (yesterday) he was siting next to me and was aroused for half of the time, but at least he could control it and did not have to get up and go.
He has also become better at returning phone calls and picks up the phone even when he is abroad and I call him(which he only does for his family). He is generally a very, very busy man but makes time for me if I ask him and call a few times.
What I find really weird is that he passes messages to me through the creation of an imaginary third person whom he "talks" to on the phone when I am in his presence. For example, he left me waiting for him for half an hour ten days ago. Yesterday, when I saw him, he picked up his cell phone and started "talking" to a woman and said, "I am deeply sorry for making you wait like that. I am very busy with my work and am really very angry at myself for making you wait without showing up." He's done this to me several times but instead of apologizing to me directly, he has to create a third person to stand in for me. Is this a form of schizophrenia or common Aspie behavior?
He has also become better at returning phone calls and picks up the phone even when he is abroad and I call him(which he only does for his family). He is generally a very, very busy man but makes time for me if I ask him and call a few times.
What I find really weird is that he passes messages to me through the creation of an imaginary third person whom he "talks" to on the phone when I am in his presence. For example, he left me waiting for him for half an hour ten days ago. Yesterday, when I saw him, he picked up his cell phone and started "talking" to a woman and said, "I am deeply sorry for making you wait like that. I am very busy with my work and am really very angry at myself for making you wait without showing up." He's done this to me several times but instead of apologizing to me directly, he has to create a third person to stand in for me. Is this a form of schizophrenia or common Aspie behavior?
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Re: Aspies and delays in processing
Thu, October 2, 2008 - 11:21 AMI'm not saying this is right or anything, but most of my relationship takes place by emails and hit and run voicemails. I intentionally leave him voicemails on the phone I know he's not at - all the time, whether we're in the same house or not. I've never done it in the same room with him, though, and I don't pretend he's another person, but I did find out the other night that it is easier for me to talk about big stuff if I don't have to look at him. He had me lay my head down on his chest and I was finally able to get some stuff out. But yeah, for me it really, really, really helps to not have any chance of being interrupted or distracted when I'm trying to say something.
Oh lawdie, and I hate to ask, but is he running off to the bathroom because he gets excited, can't think, and needs to compose himself, or is he taking his arousal in hand, so to speak? I mean, I get really nervous and twitchy and have to run off sometimes but I'm usually just running in circles until my brain calms back down. -
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Re: Aspies and delays in processing
Thu, October 2, 2008 - 11:24 AMLots of times I just want to SAY something. I don't want to have to worry about what you're gonna say or what I'm gonna say back. I just need to say something, have it heard, and be done with it. That may be an aspie thing, I don't know. -
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Re: Aspies and delays in processing
Thu, October 2, 2008 - 11:30 AMand I almost always stare off into space or look down when I'm trying to say something important. Teamnoir has busted me on that at least once - making it through an entire monologue staring at the table and only looking up at the very end to see what his expression was. Which, being an aspie, was less than earthshaking, of course. -
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Re: Aspies and delays in processing
Thu, October 2, 2008 - 11:32 AMFor a long time, he used to talk to me while his eyes remained stuck up and to the left side or right. I thought it was a bit creepy at first. He does not do it much anymore though.
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Re: Aspies and delays in processing
Thu, October 2, 2008 - 11:31 AMHe has this too!
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Re: Aspies and delays in processing
Thu, October 2, 2008 - 11:29 AMHe runs to the bathroom because he has already spasmed and had an orgasm in front of me! I am not kidding! At one point, he could barely walk when he attempted to run to th bathroom. At least he can control himself better now and things are slowly becoming normal. He also returns my phone calls more often.
I think I see what you are saying about not looking at the other person when talking about big stuff. He's done this with the imaginary person lots of times in my presence. His tone was very remorseful too. And he usually seems very nervous when doing that.
I wonder how long I'll have to wait before he starts doing more things for me. I have already attempted to move on, but he seems to be catching up and I don't want to let him go just yet. -
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Re: Aspies and delays in processing
Thu, October 2, 2008 - 11:38 AM<<I wonder how long I'll have to wait before he starts doing more things for me. I have already attempted to move on, but he seems to be catching up and I don't want to let him go just yet.>>
Ask or tell him SPECIFICALLY to do those things for you. Then see how long you have to wait.
<<he usually seems very nervous when doing that. >>
oh yeah. it's like a state of near panic attack. the slightest word or movement on your part (if he's like me) could freeze him up so he goes into brain lock and loses his train of thought completely. if the imaginary person thing bothers you, try to work with him to find a more socially acceptable alternative, like talking to the little person sitting on your left earlobe or leaving you an actual message on your home/work/cell phone that you can get later.
and um, it seems like y'all could use a little help slowing him down, too. I wonder if wearing a cock ring would help with the premature ejaculations? -
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Re: Aspies and delays in processing
Thu, October 2, 2008 - 11:44 AMSunshine, are you a Scorpio? -
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Re: Aspies and delays in processing
Thu, October 2, 2008 - 11:58 AMgod, no, although I'm terribly attracted to them. I'm a Virgo, almost a Libra. 21st of September. beyond that I don't know much. -
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Re: Aspies and delays in processing
Thu, October 2, 2008 - 12:16 PMtalk about delays in processing- I just read this entire thread from the top down, never realising that I have everything set for "newest post first" and didn't realise I was going backwards till I got to the first post-on the bottom.... -
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Re: Aspies and delays in processing
Thu, October 2, 2008 - 12:35 PMgood morning! or something like that, anyway...
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